Hot discussion: my husband is 34 years old this year and wants to read a doctoral degree. What should I do in the future to do scientific research?

Some netizens ask questions ： We have a three-year-old son , In a first tier city , The family's annual income is about 50 ten thousand , My annual income is about two hundred and seventy thousand . The house has a monthly loan 8000, If he is a doctoral student, our income will basically be halved , And the children grow up , Education is also a big expense , Fortunately, now there are old people to help us take care of our children , We also have some savings , Life in the next few years is basically no problem , I just can't consider changing my house .

In fact, I support his doctoral study , I always think it's not easy for people to find what they want to do , Scientific research is a great undertaking , What's more, he likes .

But I'm worried. First, his English is poor , There has been little success before , I just sent a Chinese article at the core of China , Can't apply to a good school . Second, he is old , The results are not good , It's hard to graduate . Third, even after four or five years of doctoral graduation , It's hard to find a job . He wants to study basic science and Engineering , That is to say, one of the Tiankeng majors .

To tell you the truth, he's not very smart , It's a little lazy to do things , But I prefer to study and ponder problems , Personality is more suitable for scientific research .

Should he read in this situation ？

The first thing to see is mostly opposition ：

Answer one

author ： fine-tuning

After experiencing , I found that reading a blog is a winner take all , A career where cannon fodder is not the denominator . How to put it? , Doctors with average results often face a very embarrassing situation , High end jobs are still out of luck , But ordinary posts are qualified before reading a doctoral degree , It's not good to go back to the grass after a few years . In case you see that your old brother is better than yourself , Then the mentality will collapse .

So reading a blog is actually about future expectations , It's kind of like betting with leverage . So politics is not correct, but the realistic view is that if you read a blog, you should not go to the best place , If you don't get good results, don't stick to it . Run when you see the situation is bad .

We've studied sunk costs for ten years , But I still can't make good life decisions .

Put aside whether it's worth it or not 、 Whether the intellectual talent is enough or not , Let's just talk about the intensity of reading blogs .

Take myself for example , The fixed time cost per week is ：

1. Suppose you take only one required course , attend class;class begins + homework + Prepare for the exam for a week 10 Hours are not too much

2. Two ongoing research projects , The kind of meeting every week . There is a content report for the meeting , Can make some results and promote progress , Each project costs... Per week 15 Hours are very conservative

3. A teaching assistant for salary （TA）, Our college takes... Every semester 1.5 Course , Change homework 、 After class Q & A and （ Prepare lessons occasionally ） Add up to at least one course per week 10 Hours , common 15 Hours, so there's basically no accident , The minimum fixed working hours in a week are 10+15*2+15=55 Hours , Spread it evenly for a week 7 Working hours every day in the sky can't run away . Of course, this is very dynamic , Occasionally, the research task is not so heavy , Occasionally, the teaching assistant's task is not so heavy , Or the pressure of homework is less occasionally .

But don't forget , This is not life, eating, drinking, Lazar entertainment , It doesn't count when you're sick and can't work with a cold .

So even if there is no age discrimination in the workplace , You can't read a blog too late . exceed 30 year , From energy 、 Family responsibility 、 Can't hold up under income pressure . Take a step back , Professionals who try to get through the bottleneck period by reading a PhD , It's estimated that eight out of ten have had a worse time . Twenty thousand steps back , Even if you hold on , But there is a high probability that the results are mediocre . I really don't know how competitive Dr. mediocre, who is nearly 40, is in the workplace .

In fact, people who read a blog will read it more or less with some ideals and pride , But the reality is often very cruel , Most people's real income must be negative . From my point of view , The prerequisite for a PhD is either money or time , Unfortunately, most people don't touch either （ Like myself ）.

Young man , Run fast ！

Answer two

author ： Dong doesn't understand

link ：https://www.zhihu.com/question/494041798/answer/2186528279

You are over thirty this year , Do a pure physical work with no future and can't make paper In the direction of the sinkhole , The doctor is finally graduating , No job found , I can only continue to do the blog, slow down for two years, and then look at the opportunities . the weather is nice today , Still as usual , There are still no weekends , I still came to the office wearing slippers at more than eight o'clock in the morning , First sigh , Sit down again , Then go out and take a large glass of hot water with a glass full of yellow tea dirt , Hot water is very hot , You hold it tight , It seems to warm your cold heart , You turn on the proud dual screen , A boring series , Another paper that you have exhausted all your efforts and has been directly rejected many times , Another sigh , Don't want to see it , Pat the bald oval head with your left hand , Use your right hand to hold the spectacle frame that just broke a leg last month and was stuck by you , Turn around and ask me ：“ You teach me , How can I become a better person ？！”

I have no choice , It can only be said ：“ come on. ！“

But every time these two words seem to have a miraculous effect , So you start a new day with confidence 15 Hours of intense work .

Answer three

author ：findyi

link ：https://www.zhihu.com/question/494041798/answer/2187320361

We have a three-year-old son , In a first tier city , The family's annual income is about 50 ten thousand , My annual income is about two hundred and seventy thousand . The house has a monthly loan 8000, If he is a doctoral student, our income will basically be halved , And the children grow up , Education is also a big expense , Fortunately, now there are old people to help us take care of our children , We also have some savings , Life in the next few years is basically no problem , I just can't consider changing my house .

Annual household income tax 50 That's good , The house should also be bought early, otherwise the mortgage is unlikely to be 8000, Unless you want to buy a big house later , There seems to be little pressure to maintain the status quo , If my husband doesn't quit his job, reading a blog should belong to a more nourishing life .

My husband has 34 One year old , My career has not been very smooth , Now I want to read a blog , In fact, I support his doctoral study , I always think it's not easy for people to find what they want to do , Scientific research is a great undertaking , What's more, he likes .

Because my career is not very smooth, I want to read a PhD , This has nothing to do with finding what you want to do , The middle-aged have finished their doctoral studies 40 s , future 5-7 There won't be much income in a year , It is not based on the interest in doing scientific research, but on the fantasy of changing the dilemma of career through doctoral study , Note that fantasy is used here , because 5-7 There are too many variables in the year , Can you be admitted to a good university doctor 、 Can you graduate after passing the examination 、 Can you make achievements during your doctoral study 、 Can you find a good job after graduation , Every step is not so easy to go .

To tell you the truth, he's not very smart , It's a little lazy to do things , But I prefer to study and ponder problems , Personality is more suitable for scientific research .

Lazy but like to think about problems is suitable for scientific research ？ What's the logic , Don't even talk about doctoral students 90% Most of the master's students like to think about problems , Not too lazy , Thinking about problems is just a little ability to do scientific research , Just a necessary condition, not a sufficient condition .

But I'm worried. First, his English is poor , There has been little success before , I just sent a Chinese article at the core of China , Can't apply to a good school . Second, he is old , The results are not good , It's hard to graduate . Third, even after four or five years of doctoral graduation , It's hard to find a job . He wants to study basic science and Engineering , That is to say, one of the Tiankeng majors .

Seeing this paragraph, I have to persuade you to retreat , Originally, a family's after tax income 50 A small middle-class home of 10000 , But because her husband's career is not going well, she wants to study for a doctor of basic science and Engineering , It's hard to get into a big factory after graduation , You can only roll College , Now most colleges and universities clearly stipulate recruitment requirements 35 Under the age of , This is basically the rhythm of unemployment after graduation ...

There are many ways to solve the problems in your career ： Change jobs, change leaders 、 Change industry, change track 、 Start a business 、 Doing sideline work 、 Investment and financial management, etc , Among these, only I haven't heard of anyone whose middle-aged career is not going well , What can be changed by reading a blog ...

Toss about 7,8 In, families returned directly from the middle class to poverty ..

Blind guess your husband may be too tired at work , Produce De meaning , I just want to escape through reading ,,,

But the reality can't allow anyone to escape ？

Answer four

author ： Answer questions and dispel doubts, Mr. Li

link ：https://www.zhihu.com/question/494041798/answer/2186718795

Another crippled by Cobb . Besides, your husband's conditions are not suitable for bo , Reading a blog will not solve your current dilemma .

A doctor is walking on the road , There comes a fortune teller . The fortune teller suddenly stopped, looked at his face and said, "look at your face..." , The sky is full , The pavilion is surrounded by . This is a sign of great wealth , There must be a good wife , Both sons and daughters , There are villas by the sea , There are millions of savings at home .

The gentleman laughed when he heard it , Promise ！ Mr. Miao Yi ！ I graduated from doctor for two years , single , The monthly salary is more than 7000 , Carrying a mortgage , Work overtime until nine o'clock every day .

The fortune teller touched his long beard and said ,“ Sure enough, reading changes fate ”！

These are all objections , But there are also those who have no objection ：

Answer one

author ： Big winder  

link ：https://www.zhihu.com/question/494041798/answer/2186719440

The comments are basically not supported , Let me also talk about my experience .

We both used to work in state-owned enterprises in new first tier cities , It's within the system . My husband 29 He resigned at the age of and went abroad to study for a doctoral degree , Didn't get a green card , Now working as an assistant professor in another small country . I 33 At the age of, he began to study for a doctoral degree in another overseas university , Now I'm reading . Our average family , Working class , There is a small house for marriage , Now children 6 year , International School, primary school , Husband's school reimburses children's reading expenses .

Let's start with the negative , The first is missing the opportunity to improve the house . secondly , In his doctoral years, our life was really hard , Although there are scholarships, they are only enough to live , Compare our classmates to change rooms and cars , Buy luxury goods , That's a big gap .

Now let's talk about good . Reading blogs these years has really opened our eyes , I'm looking for a better job than before , Now you can choose from all over the world , This was something we both dared not think of before , The children also went with us to many places . secondly , Now the friends we make are basically doctors , Bo Hou , College teachers and so on , I feel that the overall quality is high , They also have their own methods for their children's education , It is worth exchanging and learning from , There are many things that I and my former colleagues and classmates have never thought of seeing . They are generally not very anxious about the current burden reduction , There are friends and children in junior high school , Not satisfied with existing knowledge , Find university professors you know to teach physics every week .

Compared with millions of people , We are still loser, But compared with myself , Or compared with most of my former colleagues , We have made progress . Some people say that reading a blog wastes time , I've been promoted to the management level for a few years , I don't agree with this view . So many people graduate with master's degrees every year , Can I be promoted to management after working for several years ？ Can really enter a big factory , Or a few people are promoted . A doctorate can make your downline higher , For those who are not very sociable , People who don't adapt to the current corporate culture are actually a good choice . Of course, if you are strong in all aspects , And eat well , And love scientific research , Of course that's the best , Such a person can't go anywhere .

Think about the years of life , Since the subject said that her husband was not successful in the unit , Then why not change your mind , I have to die on the same road ？ Since you want to read it, read it , It's just that the economy has been tense for a few years , It's not too bad . If you give up , It must be a pity in the future , At that time, we can only hope in the children , Why? . This is similar to my experience , But it's not a bad career , But I don't want to let knowledge rot a little , When times abandon you , Will not say goodbye .

Answer two

author ：Mingjian Fu

I am a 33 He began to read a doctor at the age of ,37 Year old graduation , Like you , And it took three years to get into . On the job test , The father of two children , The review time every day is more than 9 p.m. and can't start until the child falls asleep , Day after day , It took three years to get into the exam , I'm afraid only I can understand the hardships during this period . Four years of doctoral study , I used a persistence that ordinary people can't do , Study while working , Also take into account all kinds of family chores to pick up and send children , Finally, he just left his full-time classmates behind , They haven't graduated yet . I'm now , Now, associate professor , I think it's worth it , With a doctor, I also work as a business consultant , Income has also increased a lot .

The editor replied

This is similar to my experience , But it's not a bad career , But I don't want to let knowledge rot a little , When times abandon you , Will not say goodbye .

When I was a blogger 36 One year old , Have two children , A full-time doctor .

Different times will have different opportunities , Everyone's path is not just copy and paste , But also by perseverance and talent .

I am a 14-18 Doctor in , Now he is an associate professor of a local university 、 The dean of the Department 、 Master Tutor .

Take a look at the other answers and comments under this question , Few people encourage the subject's husband , Or give him some if you want to choose to read a blog , Advice on what to do first .

however , They all have one thing in common , No one is older than the husband , in other words , I haven't experienced that stage yet .

I went through that stage , At that time, two children were in primary school .

I'm not in favor of getting a PhD at an old age ：

There are several conditions for a PhD at an advanced age ：

1. A certain economic foundation

2. The full support of the family

3. Meet a good mentor

4. Strong physique and perseverance

5. Very strong learning ability

One condition is missing , Reading a blog will be difficult .

I also know a lot of older bloggers , Finally graduated , And professional advancement .

On the basis of meeting the above five conditions , I support him to realize his ideal .

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